As with my last pregnancy I’ve switched from Pilates to prenatal yoga at 30-weeks. It was getting harder to heave my legs over my head for Pilates and there is something very balancing about yoga that I find comforting at this stage of pregnancy. The teachers at the studio I go to are also amazing (many are doula’s) so the yoga classes are filled with helpful topics, birthing tips (which came in handy for Syd’s delivery) and more each week.
This week our topic focused on postpartum depression; something which I didn’t admit to having, but looking back probably had with Syd (or at least had a case of the ‘baby blues’ which is also common). She reminded us that after birth our first priority is ourselves and our baby. We need to sleep and feed; and leave everything else to everyone else.
I’m the first to admit I didn’t do this well with Syd. In between our horrible feeding sessions I was doing laundry, washing dishes, changing diapers, washing pump parts getting ready for the next feed. I felt bad asking Royce and others for help with things so that I could go rest. I felt like a nag telling people to do things that I could see needed to be done and I could just do myself. Eventually it all just started to build up and then after 3 weeks; I hit rock bottom and it was hard to dig myself out.
Needless to say I learned from that. This time around we are hiring a mothers helper to mainly help out with Syd, but to also help with other things around the house. And thanks to last nights class I’m mentally creating a list to make for the helper (and for people who visit). This list will be posted so that they can remind themselves (so I don’t have to) of what they can do to help…or if they see me doing these things on the list to tell me to stop and go lay down. It won’t be a glamorous list, but it is a needed list, since last time I found telling people what to do mentally exhausting.
As my teacher said last night the last thing you need help with is holding the baby (which is what most people want to help with). She reminded us that Mama’s should be holding the baby; it helps release oxytocin which helps prevent PPD and the only times you shouldn’t be holding baby are when you are showering or sleeping.
Got it, noted! I’m thankful for the much-needed reminder. I hope to be better about this, I hope I can get past my hesitation to ask people to help doing the mindless tasks I could do, but shouldn’t be doing, in order to hopefully avoid what I (and Royce who had to deal with me) went through the first time around.